In the spirit of the holidays, we asked exhibitors to pretend they were their horses and speak from their point of view. If your horse could text you, what would they say? What would they ask for for Christmas? What advice would they give you in general? Is there any advice they would give you to better your riding skills in 2023?
These exhibitors’ horses certainly had a lot to say. They had no problems expressing their needs and wants and giving their owners a few riding tips. Read on for some fun and inspiring insight from several famous, opinionated, and outspoken horses in our industry.
Emma Gore – If my horse could text, he would definitely be at the top of my best friend list. Ready for his next Instagram photo shoot. He would ask for an endless amount of treats and a subscription for monthly salt water baths! He would tell me to relax and have fun, and we were ready to take on the 14 to 18. Our relationship is fun and loving. When it’s show time, we know what to do and get it done. Ben is my best friend and show partner. He has taught me a lot. Together, we have accomplished many goals, more than I could have ever imagined. I am excited about our future and continued success.
Samantha Foust – If Hazel could text me, she would say, “come get me from the turnout” or “don’t forget me.” She will yell at anyone who makes eye contact with her if she’s out in a turnout for longer than she wants to be there. Hazel would ask for an unlimited amount of cookies for Christmas. Her advice to me for riding would probably be to stay out of her way and that she’s got it.
Beckie Peskin – I feel like this is Jesse: Hey. Where r u? Almost out of treats. Also, I may or may not have ripped the face off of 3 more sleazies. 😈🤭🤑. When are you coming up next? I really need more treats. Maybe just send the kid…
Sarah Rosciti – Anakin to me: “Mommmm, I miss you, no one is picking up my hay I dropped outside my window for me, and I have only gotten one treat today; the mare across the aisle made a mean face at me, and I’m very upset. I’m ready to go to Uncle Bob’s (breeding farm). It’s a lot more fun there. I want a new jolly ball and more stud muffins, and I like Gray mares…
Emma Brown – If Brett would text me, he might send me the Amazon link to more treats. LOL! Which most definitely leads me to what he would ask for. I am sure he would ask for treats, especially the apple licks we hang in his stall. I think the advice Brett would give me is, “Relax, mom, I got this.” It’s easy to let your nerves get the best of you, and I feel so lucky to have a horse who always gives me a sense of trust that I can relax and have fun. Because honestly, that’s what it is all about. I would say our relationship is very kind; I have never owned a horse with a heart as big as Brett’s. He gives his all to me every single time, and we have a bond that is so special. He whinnies every time I walk in the barn, which always puts a smile on my face. I love to sit in or by his stalls and pet him/feed him treats. I feel fortunate to have the bond that I do with him.
Kim Gutowski – Well, mom, if you ask me what I want for Christmas and the new year, I would love to have you come out to the barn more often. That way, we could go on more of those trail rides. You know, the ones where you let me eat grass along the way, and also, you could use that special curry comb and the vacuum on all my itchy spots more often. You could also give me more licorice nibs or gummy bears that I love so much.
Ashley Enoch-Scott – She would ask me for more treats because I don’t feed her enough. She would probably tell me to let her sleep more so she can get her beauty sleep. She would also love to come home with me and sleep at the house. She wants all my attention and would love to go everywhere with me. Advice for 2023 would be not to teach her new stuff, so she doesn’t have to work any harder than she already does.
Kathy Tobin – Haaaay you! What were you thinking???! I need some help here, and you are just sitting there! Don’t expect me to read your mind! Add more leg or slowly close both, don’t grab me with your legs! Next year, remember to ride every stride and use your legs carefully. You can make up for some of your miscues by giving me more peppermints for Christmas!
Tiina Volmer – The horse I’m currently riding is a 2 yr old that I started and am going to start showing. His name is Duece – Willy Willy Wanna Win. If he could text me, he would have a lot of questions. I don’t understand why I can’t eat all day and you are always rationing my food – that’s just mean. Why do you people talk about these horse shows all the time – it seems like I work harder and eat less – that’s stupid. I know Christmas is coming up because there’s super yummy wreaths on the doors that I always get in trouble for eating or pulling down. I would like Santa to bring me an endless supply of alfalfa, younger friends who like me, not the old farts that I get turned out with who tell me off all the time and try to run me off. It would be really nice if my rider could focus and not have so much to teach me all at once – what’s the big hurry? When we are together in the riding arena, you seem to be confused a lot which makes me confused – don’t do that. I do like you giving me attention when we are standing still as I don’t like to over-exert my energy I need for eating. The thing you do to me on the ground with the chain under my chin is stupid. Why do I have to keep up with your walking and I don’t understand why we have to trot together. I’ll catch up sooner or later – what’s the big hurry? You’re so weird sometimes, but I love you – well, actually I love all people because they’re fun to play with.
Sharon Conway – That’s easy…Milton (CR Hershey Bar) would text me that he needs treats in his bag on his door, so he doesn’t have to constantly beg other horse “moms” to give him their horse’s treats. His advice for 2023 is to stop pulling on his face when doing a lead change; that is awfully confusing. But, with enough treats, he will forgive me.
Hayley Rae Riddle – If my horse Dawson could text me, he would probably say: “Hey. I would like another flake of hay. I have no more from breakfast, and I can already feel myself getting skinny.” He would probably also text me: “I heard a weird noise, and I think there are ghosts in the barn. I’m really scared and think you need to come save me!” For Christmas, Dawson would most likely want a bale of alfalfa put in his stall, but don’t put a bow on it because those are scary. When it comes to riding advice, Dawson would ask me to let him gallop out before every ride because he likes to run really fast!
Grant Mastin – If Hand Made Machine, aka Carl, Carlos, or Carl Kawasaki could text me, I’m sure there are a lot of things he’d like to ask for or say. For Christmas, this is definitely what he would say; it’s been a very long year, and I’ve done a lot. I really would like to have the huge field all to myself every time I get turned out, and if you could make sure I get all the carrots, but not apples – those are gross, and hay, that would be great. I really don’t think it’d be too much to ask for.
When it comes to show days, I know there is a lot that comes across his mind. So, here are a few quotes: I think we can cut out the longing. I mean, do we really need that anymore? The first day out is great. I’ll admit, but come on. It’s 3:30 a.m.?! You’re already here? It’s trail day?? Don’t worry about taking off my wraps. I’m on my way out! Why are you doing so much? Just let me take care of it. Tongue’s out, we’re cool. I mean, if you really want me to, I will, but is it necessary today? It’s trail day…get the music cranked, and let’s get rolling!
Emma DeJong – If my horse Houston could text me, he would definitely ask for more cookies. He would ask for his favorite molasses cookies from the bakery downtown. He would also make a point that he wants to get ridden when he feels like it and would also give me a little bit of sass.
Brister Shum – I actually had an animal communicator come to talk with my horse, High Road Reload. Although I was initially quite skeptical, it was beneficial! The bond between “Ike” and myself wasn’t really there at first. Ike told me I was in too big of a hurry to win! He said, “Just relax and have fun and we will get there together!” I did exactly that…and he was right! Now, he would tell me, “Lady, sit squarely so I can do my job better!” For Christmas, he wants a week off…but he may have to wait. Gold Coast comes calling!
Tali Terlizzi – Well, all of my horses have different personalities, but I’ll choose one; if (Jeffery) Pinball Machine could text, he would ask me to stop staring at him in his stall and get him another flake of alfalfa and that the diet he is on is absolutely ridiculous because Fat Lives Matter…with that being said, for Christmas, he’d probably want some of Santa’s leftover cookies. He would advise me to trust God’s plan; life throws you curveballs sometimes, so you have to keep looking forward. Advice per my riding skills, he’d probably tell me, is that I need to sit down and let him do his thing.
Scott Reinartz – I would be told that I expect too much, and life is too short to work so hard. I should go with the flow, take several breaks and give lots of treats. They would ask for a more extended vacation over the Holiday season. At least until spring, they love to go to Florida over the winter, but they would prefer to graze and enjoy the fresh air instead of working the whole time. I should take time to go on a long, several weeks cruise. Also, if I could shed a few pounds, it would be easier on their backs. So I should not get carried away with Holiday Cheer. Overall, they are pleased and would not want to go to a different owner. They know how good they have it. Happy Holidays. Oh, PS: Why do we have to be so involved and go to every class? Could I not just pick one and be happy with that?
Morgan Jennings – Simply Presidential, or “Abe,” would text me and tell me his hourly nap schedule, tell me not to bother longing him, even if he is bouncing in the crossties (he literally gets that excited to go to work), and probably recommend that I listen to my mom (Michelle Warda) or his mom (Laurie Hoopes). All I can say is, he would be THAT ‘person’ that sends each thought as a separate text and then never answer you for days because he forgot. If you know, you know. Chaos. I think he would ask for a variety pack of curry combs and a massage…boy loves the spa treatment. Finally, Abe would like to suggest that I practice the pleasure driving more than four times before attempting to show at THE CONGRESS and not hit any more walls in practice. Don’t worry; I successfully steered clear of any in the show pen, but I know he rolled his eyes the day before we showed. Sorry, Abe. #rookie.
Sherri Hennis – From JimBob – I would really like it if you would match my longing time on a treadmill, and I get to control the treadmill settings. And what’s up with the extra food for my performance halter build, and then you expect me to be flawless up over the trail poles? I would like peppermints (not the cheap ones) and a week off for Christmas!
What would your horse text you? What would they ask for Christmas? Let us know in the comments.
