You’ve prepared endlessly. You got up before work or school to ride, you feel strong and focused, and your horse is well-rested and ready to perform. You warm up in the practice pen, and everything feels perfect. You have positive energy pumping through your body.
You enter the pen, and before you know it, it happens. A gut-wrenching mistake that puts you out of the running – your horse moves his pivot foot during your showmanship run, or you miss your diagonal in your equitation pattern.
You leave the pen feeling defeated, like you don’t belong and that all this hard work was for nothing. How can things go so wrong when everything you’ve been doing in preparation for this show was so right?
There are many causes of horse show disappointment, and it can show up in many ways. Whether it is being disappointed in your placings, disappointed in your horse’s performance or disappointed at yourself for the mistakes you’ve made, here are some tips to help you recover from a less than stellar showing.
1) Be disappointed and then regroup
It is alright to be disappointed or discouraged but keep it to a short period. Unfortunately, you cannot go back in time and fix a mistake so to move on, you have to learn to let it go. This is an emotional sport with a lot of hard work, sweat and heart put into it so a few tears may be shed. Never be disrespectful and find a quiet place away from everything to let it all out. Hug your horse, regroup and follow tip number #2.
2) Focus on what you do have and not on what you don’t
It is so easy to get caught up in it all. You are walking the barn aisle with world champion riders, highly skilled trainers, and celebrity horses. The whole horse show environment can feel a little overwhelming sometimes, and you may feel as though you don’t belong. This is a slippery slope which can lead to negative self-talk like you aren’t good enough or you need a better horse. Keep your focus on what you do have – a willing partner, supportive trainers and the opportunity to show.
3) Life isn’t always fair
Fairness is always going to be very tough to achieve with a judged event especially with so much going on in a pen at one time. Maybe the only time the judges saw your horse in a crowded pen was the few strides where he didn’t look his best. Or maybe they hardly noticed you at all because you were covered up by several horses at the time. It wasn’t intentional, and the judges are doing the best they possibly can, but maybe the circumstances of the pen just didn’t allow you to have the fairest look. This is one of the great life lessons that we can learn from showing horses. Sometimes it just isn’t your day, or you catch a bad break, and unfortunately, there isn’t a whole lot you can do about it but accept it. See rule #7
4) Phone a Friend
Call your best horse show friend, sister, husband or mom. Call someone who always has your back and believes in you no matter what. They’ll help to put things in perspective and give you the pep talk to you need to get your mind back on the right track. They’ll let you know they are proud of you, that mistakes happen and that the journey you are on with your horse is the most important part of showing horses.
5) Remember where you came from
Keeping an eye on where you started will give you amazing perspective of how far you’ve come. Did you just start showing horses? Have you never shown at this level previously? Are you trying a new event? Focus on you and your horse and think about all you’ve done together. Be proud of where you came from and what you’ve accomplished. Look back on your past to move forward to your future.
6) Don’t lose sight of why you do this
Remind yourself why you show horses in the first place. Usually, it starts with spending time with your horse, but there are other reasons as well. Perhaps you enjoy the challenge of getting better, you like the social scene of seeing all your friends at the show, or you enjoy working toward a goal. If everything went perfect and you won everything, where would the challenge be? If you didn’t have a friend to talk to about your not so perfect ride, would you still be able to relate so well?
7) There is always another horse show
There is another horse show next weekend, next month and next year. Just because you didn’t make the finals, doesn’t mean you are a bad rider, have a bad horse or aren’t able to succeed. It has been said many times before but showing horses should be fun, and if you aren’t having fun, you need to re-evaluate why you are doing it. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself and remember there will always be another chance to go to a horse show.
Any competition is full of highs and lows and showing horses is no exception. Success does not come without struggle and keeping these tips in mind will assist you in letting a disappointing performance go. And remember…there’s always another horse show.
About the Author: Julie Hoefling was born and raised in Akron, Michigan but now resides in Cave Creek, Arizona with her husband, Jerry. She works at Kahala Brands as a Director of Marketing. Julie shows her horse, Shady Impulse in the Novice Amateur Western All-Around events under the guidance of Ryan and Andrea Kail.
