Imagine yourself lost in the depths of an unknown forest, completely removed from the influence of modern society. The horrors of this foreign land is up to your imagination to decide, that is, if you are in control of your own conscience and are fully aware of the danger you are in.
As sweat pours down your face and all you wish to find is another person to comfort and rescue you, you stumble upon two objects: one is a backpack filled with items necessary for survival, that being a knife, food, water, clothing, and much more.
The other is a pack of colored pencils, the type you would buy at a regular store on a regular day in a regular community. So, what choice will you make? The decision seems blatantly obvious: the backpack. But what made that decision so quick and simple?
Well, it was the mini society of people yelling inside your head, the ones who conditioned you to act, love, hate, talk, and move in a certain way.
Hello, my name is Emily Ambrose, and I am the young girl who chose the box of colorful, fantastic pencils that would be completely useless if stranded in the forest. You can either call me naïve and ridiculous, or you can patiently wait for my explanation. These wonderful pieces of color coordinated graphite are a commonly used item in art, so, I saw them as an opportunity to draw myself a new life, uninfluenced by other people and solely designed by my own hand.
As a young, 16 year-old equestrian who fell in love with horses when I was five, I have learned more than imaginable from my humble companions. I have become a strong individual with a passion to design my dreams with the colors I chose, while many others fall into the norm and make a decision influenced solely by the thoughts of others.
However, I have learned the struggles of being doubted by others and, most significantly, myself. I have thoroughly thought about my uncertainty and decided to share it with my fellow equestrians who I know will be empowered by my spirit of optimism, even when I question my po
tential, just as millions of other horse riders do everyday.
Two years ago, I nervously trotted into a huge indoor show pen with a new horse I bought just two months prior. Two years later, I confidently trot into the show pen with my best friend, my partner in crime, my entire life. For the two whole years in between, all 730 days, I spent my time with this horse.
After riding every day and lessons every week with my incredible trainers, Seth and Amber Clark, my horse slowly transformed from doing only hunter under saddle to performing in all around events, which include showmanship, equitation, horsemanship, and hunter hack. He carried me out of the show pen with a yellow Congress medallion, an award I could hardly dream of achieving.
I got to know Ralph, who was recognized by many simply by his show name, Play For A Minute. To others, all they see is the image of a tall, thin girl trotting around on a tall, lean horse, just there to show and earn some awards. But what they don’t see is the irreplaceable connection we share.
Whether I am wrapping some exotic and crazy polo wraps around his legs (my tie dye set being my favorite) or practicing a showmanship pattern until it’s perfect, I always feel the bond between us that make us a team. Day after day, I ride and spend time with Ralph. I have creatively selected a few nicknames, some being ones he was previously called, and they include Ralph mouth, Ralph monster, and yes, of course, chunky. And call me crazy, but this horse expresses his happiness through smiling.
Sure, you may think it’s the flehmen response (curling upper lip), but come spend a day with Ralph and laugh at his silly personality and I can 99.9% assure you that lip will be in the air showing off his rather gross teeth. Through these endless hours I have spent working, laughing, and talking with Ralph, I have learned his signal to me when he is too tired, and I know exactly what would agitate him.
Two years ago, I cared for, rode, and showed a horse. Today, I live for an animal whose entire life is solely dedicated to making people happy. While all of this may seem meaningless, this short and continuous journey taught me lessons and characteristics that I will carry with me the rest of my life. He has taught me more about myself than any other horse, friend, trainer, or parent possibly could have. But most importantly, Ralph has taught me the true meaning behind the title “equestrian.”
Equestrians are a unique group of individuals who have an incredible gift with horses. They provide a voice to a mute animal, an animal whose heart pours grace and tranquility into a broken, unfulfilled human soul.
Throughout an equestrian’s life, this incredible capability is overlooked, doubted, and even ridiculed by non-horse people. After years of being disregarded, many horse enthusiasts begin to question who they truly are and who they strive to be, just like any other athlete would if they were constantly questioned.
As an avid rider, I personally understand the feeling of being underestimated. Unfortunately, after hearing over and over again that “horse-back riding is not a sport” and “all you do is sit there,” I have found myself thinking the same thing. I began to second guess my passion, my sport, and my lifestyle. Just like any other person, I was trapped in my own pessimistic mind, molded and hastily created by the disrespectful mindset of non-equestrians surrounding me.
I was caught thinking “I can’t, I can’t, I can’t” until one day, I finally found what I can do, what I can achieve and why I can call myself an equestrian.
Over my short, two year journey with Ralph, I have caught myself subconsciously thinking about the actions I thought I could never accomplish, and occasionally, still think about:
I can’t jump; all I ever do is miss my distances and drop my horse at the base, no matter how many times my trainer instructs me not to.
I can’t ride without my irons; I am going to fall off because I have no balance and weak legs.
I can’t win at this horse show; everyone here is so much better than me and so much more accomplished than I can even dream to be.
I can’t do horsemanship; I don’t have a short horse and perfect outfit, the ‘ideal’ western image.
I can’t perform this showmanship pattern; it’s too difficult for my low skill level.
I’m sure many, if not everyone, could relate to at least one challenge I have mentally faced. However, one day, in the midst of thinking about my relationship with my horses, I uncovered what I cannot prevent myself from doing because my inner-equestrian connection to these sweet animals constantly pulls me toward these feelings:
I cannot resist the sweet scent of hay when I walk into the barn, followed by the always merry neigh of my best friends.
I cannot keep myself from hugging my horse a thousand times, giving him a million kisses, and yes, of course, feeding him hundreds of peppermints.
I cannot help but love his soft muzzle, the muzzle that I kiss time and time again.
I cannot stop myself from dreaming about our promising future, filled with so much happiness, but also grief, considering hardships will only make us better.
I cannot refrain from laughing when he acts like a dork after I give him a treat or play with him in the pasture.
I cannot express the feeling of acceptance that I have received from my horse; not only did I choose him, but he also chose me.
I cannot describe the way my heart is strengthened when I am around him as he pours his spirit into mine, a humble offering of true love.
I cannot believe the rider I have become, all because of my four legged best friend who stood next to me, pointed to the colored pencils and gently whispered “you can.”
