Although most trainers won’t admit it publicly, everyone plays favorites.
In Part 1 of this series, anonymous trainers shared stories about the horses that earned a special place in their hearts. In Part 2, they revealed the qualities that make certain clients stand out. This time, we asked what may have been the most uncomfortable question yet: What happens when a horse isn’t your favorite?
It’s not a topic trainers like to discuss. Every horse deserves quality care, consistent training, and every opportunity to succeed. That’s part of being a professional. Still, every trainer admitted there are horses that demand more patience, more creativity, and far more emotional energy than others.
Interestingly, most trainers didn’t like the phrase least favorite horse.
“The horse that challenges you the most isn’t always the horse you like the least,” one trainer explained. “Usually it’s just the horse that makes you work the hardest. There are definitely mornings when you look at the schedule and think, ‘This is going to be a long ride,’ but that doesn’t mean you don’t care about that horse.”
That distinction came up repeatedly. Many trainers said the horses they struggled with were rarely mean or untalented. More often, they lacked confidence, questioned every cue, carried emotional baggage from previous experiences, or simply weren’t naturally suited for the job they were being asked to do.
“The easy horses make you look smart,” one trainer laughed. “The hard ones actually make you smarter.”
When we asked how they approach horses they don’t naturally connect with, one answer surfaced over and over again: they refuse to let emotion dictate the training.
“You have to be fair every single day,” one trainer said. “The horse doesn’t know it’s your least favorite. It only knows whether you’re consistent. If you walk into the barn frustrated because of yesterday’s ride, you’ve already made a mistake before you ever swing a leg over.”
Several trainers admitted they actually become more patient with difficult horses than they are with naturally talented ones. While it’s tempting to get frustrated when a horse repeats the same mistake day after day, they believe those are the horses that require the calmest, most thoughtful approach.
“It’s easy to assume a horse is just being difficult,” one trainer explained. “But, usually there’s a reason. Maybe it’s confused. Maybe it’s sore. Maybe it’s anxious. Maybe it simply doesn’t understand what you’re asking. My job is to figure that out instead of getting mad.”
Another trainer said that before blaming the horse, they first look inward.
“If I’m dreading riding one every day, I have to ask myself why. Is it really the horse, or am I approaching that ride with a bad attitude because of what happened yesterday? Sometimes we carry frustration into today’s ride, and the horse ends up paying for it.”
Several trainers admitted the most challenging horses forced them to become better communicators. Unlike naturally talented horses that forgive inconsistent timing or unclear cues, difficult horses expose every weakness a rider has.
“They make you earn every good day,” one trainer said. “You have to improve your timing, your patience, and your consistency. They don’t let you get away with shortcuts.”
That doesn’t mean every trainer is the right fit for every horse.
One anonymous trainer admitted there have been horses that flourished after leaving the program.
“I don’t think every trainer speaks every horse’s language,” the trainer explained. “There have been horses that made huge improvements after going somewhere else. It wasn’t because anybody failed. Somebody else simply connected with that horse in a way I couldn’t.”
Several professionals agreed that recognizing when a horse might benefit from a different program is sometimes one of the hardest, yet most professional decisions a trainer can make.
“It’s not about pride,” another trainer said. “It’s about doing what’s best for the horse.”
Ironically, many trainers confessed that some of the horses they initially dreaded riding eventually became favorites.
“The horse I couldn’t wait to sell ended up being one of the horses I’ve cried the hardest over when he left,” one trainer admitted. “It took months before we understood each other, but once we did, I’d have kept him forever.”
Another trainer shared a similar experience.
“The horses that challenge you often become the ones you’re most proud of. They don’t hand you success. They make you earn it.”
So do these horses receive different treatment?
Every trainer answered that question the same way.
“No.”
If anything, they become more intentional. Trainers said they pay closer attention to saddle fit, soreness, turnout schedules, workload, nutrition, and mental burnout because they know behavior often has an underlying cause.
“It’s our responsibility to figure out why,” one trainer explained. “The horse doesn’t get to choose who trains it. We chose this profession.”
That mindset may be what separates professionals from amateurs.
It’s easy to enjoy riding naturally talented, uncomplicated horses. The real test of horsemanship comes when you’re handed a horse that doesn’t make the job easy. Those are the horses that require patience when progress is slow, consistency when improvement stalls, and compassion when frustration starts to build.
In the end, several trainers admitted the horses they learned the most from, were rarely their easiest ones.
“The horses that make you question yourself usually make you better,” one trainer said. “You don’t always appreciate it in the moment, but you do later.”
Perhaps that’s why so many trainers hesitated when we asked about their least favorite horses.
Because, while every trainer has horses they naturally connect with more than others, the best horsemen believe every horse deserves an opportunity…the same effort, and the same fairness.
And sometimes, the horse you least look forward to riding today becomes the one you’ll remember most tomorrow.
In case you missed them, be sure to check out Part 1 and Part 2 of our ‘Playing Favorites’ series, where anonymous horse trainers reveal their favorite horses and favorite clients.
Coming up in the fourth and final part of the series, trainers discuss how they handle their least favorite clients.
